Discussion Questions Week 1

For this week, I'm going to pick question 1 and 3.

1. Choose a selection from Week 1 and explain how the concept of romantic love is treated.
In "A & P", which I really really liked, I don't even think the concept of love is brushed, a romantic love at least. What Sammy is feeling here, is humanity, for lack of a better word. He is looking upon these three girls, tearing them apart, bit by bit, scrutinizing their every freckle, commenting upon them, and then he gives up his job for the sake of their embarrassment. I don't think that's romantic love. I think that it's sacrifice for the sake of another human, and I think not many people who do such a thing. I know that most people would just ignore a situation like that, and go about their daily lives. They'd probably say some snide remark about three girls being in a bathing suit, and what's fascinating about Updike's writing is that he doesn't give too much away. What we see is Sammy's point of view, and how he views their home, and perhaps he identifies with that way of life, and in that sense, he sympathizes them. In the beginning, he assumes their all friends and the "Queenie" being kind of like Regina George in Mean Girls. If you haven't seen it, she controls her other two friends. She's the Queen Bee. In the story, he calls them stupid, asking if they really have a brain or if it's just "a bee in a glassjar", and I'm sure that's how ANY person would feel if they saw this situation. But he steps back, and he looks at them for who they are. Three girls running an errand for their mother. I've been in a similar situation. I ran to the store one day, to get myself Starbucks, and it was a cloudy day, and I just wore a sweatshirt and some shorts. Being that I have red hair, I have a very light complexion. As I was walking out of the store into the parking lot, some older guy, probably in his early thirties, walked past me and said "ever seen the sun?" I didn't know what to say, so all I said was, "excuse me?" And he just kept walking on, and laughed with his friend. I sat in my car for a while, and against my better judgment, went back into the store. I found him, standing in line for Starbucks, and I went off on him. Everyone stared. And I walked out. Nobody stood up for me. His friend just sat and laughed, and I felt accomplished and went back to car. Maybe Sammy was doing in the story what the girls couldn't do for themselves. Speak up. And I think in that sense, some love is discussed, but not a romantic love, a brotherly love.

3. Does the selection you chose challenge the definition/beliefs you have about romantic love?
For this question, I chose "True Love" by Wislawa Szymborska. Once again, I really liked this poem because it really shows how society feels about true love, and to answer the question it both challenged by beliefs and reinforced them. The way society feels about two people in love can be summed up in one scentence, get a room. We've all heard it. And when most people see two others in love, it almost makes them sick. I think that we all learn to love from the movies, because love is dying in our society. I know that in my own experience, I certainly didn't know how to love from my parents. But, I don't think that true love is always mushy romance. I think it's very much LIFE, which is why I say the poem questions and reassures my beliefs. Love is very difficult to achieve and it's always a work in progress. Love is sacrifice, and I think people really fail to see that. True love is not marriage, or children, or cards and chocolates. It's realizing the beauty in everyone around you, and falling in LOVE with your best friend. I think it's having a language between you and your significant other that only you two can understand, whether it's spoken or silent. I also think that often times our definition of love is defined by that bible verse in 1 Corinthians. Love is patient. Love is kind. And so on, and so forth. But I don't think that's how love is anymore. People have to fight for the one they love, at least in my opinion, and no love comes without sacrifice, once again. True love isn't something you stumble upon. It's something you work towards.